Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I just gargled with NyQuil
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize
