FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
