i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
