I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
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