There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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