But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
