So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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