hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
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