so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
