Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Randomize
