I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
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I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
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Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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