so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
