Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
