Well apparently he's into motor boating.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
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I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
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I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
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