i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
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Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
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I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
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