I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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