We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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