So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
