Non-Jews are for practice
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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