The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
