First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize