New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed