Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Walk of Shame today included voting.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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