i was born a porn star she said
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
