It's like a parade of train wrecks.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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