thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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