***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
