This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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