just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Randomize