I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
