i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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