M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
