when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
