false alarm. still invincible.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize