she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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