they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
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