I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
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