She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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