I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize