ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
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