I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize