Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
