she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Randomize
