Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Randomize
