On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Randomize
