I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Are my feet made of real feet?
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
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