would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
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Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
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Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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