so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize