What did we do last night that was yellow?
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
