Got a toothbrush?
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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