I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Randomize