Dual....:-)
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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